My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Season 9
by Dennis Fielder
Summary: The gang adjusts to several of their friends having married each other, culminating in the discovery of a living car around the time of their anniversary.
1. Returning Home

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 1: Returning Home

(It opens as Doug and Twilight arrive at the library with Doug's stuff after their honeymoon.)

Twilight: Okay, and now for the fun part! Reorganizing everything to accommodate all our things!  
Doug: Right! ... Where should my books go?  
Twilight: Okay, let's see, sci-fi, fantasy, adventure... The loosely fitted shelf over there.

(The books go in.)

Twilight: Now, your Xbox and the TV...  
Doug: Ooh, how about our bedroom?!  
Twilight: ... Okay.  
Doug: Even better, Aunt Linda and Uncle Al gave us the Wii from their house as a wedding present, and dishes. Oh, and a lot of popcorn. Maybe we could have a movie night once we're settled in!  
Twilight: Okay to all that, but first...  
Doug: Oh, right.

(Doug pulls out his book case filled with DVDs.)

Doug: Where should I put it?  
Twilight: ... Shouldn't you have left that in the condo?  
Doug: Oh, I'll just use a transfer spell to put it back when we're spending time in the human world, the same with the TV and all that stuff.  
Twilight: ... Oh. Okay, anything else?  
Doug: My futon!

(Doug pulls out his futon and holds it up.)

Twilight: Okay, ooh... It may be comfortable setting it next to the free wall for leisurely reading.  
Doug: Sounds great.

(Doug does so.)

Twilight: Huh. That was easier than I thought.  
Doug: Yay, movie time!  
Twilight (sighing): Alright.  
Doug: Let's watch Follow Me Boys!  
Twilight: What's that about?

(Cut to later as their on their bed watching.)

Twilight: Aw, that's sweet.  
Spike: You guys still up.  
Doug: Hey Spike, buddy.  
Spike: Hey Doug.

(They shake and go back to the bed.)

Doug: Ooh! This gives me an idea!

(Cut to later as Twilight and Doug are asleep, cuddling each other.)

The End.


	2. Animal Care

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 2: Animal Care

(It opens at Fluttershy and Rob's cottage as the two are walking around, feeding the various animals.)

Rob: You know Fluttershy, we could run a fine pet shop if we ever needed some extra money.  
Fluttershy: Well maybe, but I think it's better to just give an animal a good home, like Tank and Rainbow Dash.  
Rob: I know. Just a thought.

(Angel Bunny comes up as Rob plops down a carrot.)

Rob: Here ya go.

(Angel kicks it at Rob's face.)

Rob: Hey!  
Fluttershy: Come on, Angel. It's lunch time.

(Angel nods and has the carrot.)

Rob: How do you do that?  
Fluttershy: Do what?  
Rob: Get that little demon in rabbit form to do something?  
Fluttershy: Oh, Angel's just getting used to you, dear.  
Rob: Yeah, well you better get used to me 'cause I'm here to stay, and I can turn into a Stratadon still.

(Angel yawns.)

Rob: Mm! ... Come on Fluttershy, let's go play Batman Arkham City on my PS3!  
Fluttershy: ... Isn't that one player?  
Rob: We'll switch around.

(Angel hops up and down.)

Rob: ... Fine, but it was my idea, so I get to go first.

(Angel nods as they head in.)

The End.


	3. Storytime XI: The Bear and the Travelers

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 3: Storytime XI: The Bear and the Travelers

(It opens as Doug walks up to class.)

Doug: Hey everypony!  
Foals: Hey Doug!  
Doug: I figured on a story I heard in middle school and really liked about being trustworthy.  
CMC: Ooh...

(Cut to an inn as Applejack is looking at a map.)

Applejack: This here is gonna be the trip of a lifetime!  
Applebloom: I just wish ya weren't goin' alone, Sis.

(Trixie comes in just as Applebloom finishes her sentence.)

Trixie: Going alone, where, Applejack?  
Applebloom: Out ta see the whole world, Trixie. If ya knew my big sister better, ya'd know she's an incurable travel bug.  
Applejack: And if ya knew my little sister better, ya'd know she's an incurable worrier.

(Applejack gives Applebloom a gentle noogie as Applebloom giggles.)

Applejack: Ever since I was just a little pony, I've been hearing stories about far away travelers who have come ta stay at the inn. Now I'd like ta see some of those places myself. But Applebloom doesn't think I'm spry enough ta get outta harm's way.  
Applebloom: It's not that. It's just that I'd feel a heck of a lot better if ya had a trustworthy friend goin' with ya.  
Trixie: What about Trixie? Trixie would be happy to stand by Applejack in a jam. Travels can be quite perilous. Why, you may be caught in a rock slide.

(Cut to Applejack and Trixie traveling the mountains as they go check on a cave when there's a rock slide, blocking them from the exit.)

Applejack: Ah no! Now Applebloom won't ever see me again!

(Trixie looks around and sees light from an opening.)

Trixie: Oh yes she will. We can get out through that hole in the ceiling.  
Applejack: Maybe for you, but I could never climb up there. It's too steep.  
Trixie: It won't be steep when Trixie is done.

(She uses her magic to pull out slabs of the cave, making a stairway to the hole as they climb out. Cut back to the inn.)

Applebloom: Ya'd make a stair outta rocks for you and Applejack ta get out?  
Trixie: Of course. Trixie would never leave a friend like Applejack in need, no matter how rough things got, and they can get very rough at sea.

(Cut to a sail boat being rocked about by a storm as water is leaking into Applejack's room, and she tries to get out, but she's trapped as a chest slides into her leg.)

Applejack: Ah, no! Help! Help! Someone help me!

(Cut to outside.)

Trixie: Wait, where's Applejack?  
Captain: We've got to get into the life boat!  
Trixie: Trixie's friend, Applejack! Trixie thinks she's down below! I've got to find her!  
Captain: It's too late! Save yourself!  
Trixie: Trixie can't leave her! She's counting on me!

(Trixie manages to get to Applejack's room.)

Applejack: Trixie!  
Trixie: Applejack. Don't worry; Trixie will save you.

(She moves the chest aside, and they head out, getting to the life boat just in time. Cut back to the inn.)

Applejack: You'd risk your life for me?  
Trixie: Certainly. And Trixie would protect you too. Why you never know when danger will strike, like in the jungle.

(Cut to a jungle as the two are looking around.)

Applejack: This jungle sure is interestin'. And full of surprises too.

(She goes to a flower as a tiger pops up as Applejack runs.)

Applejack: HELP! Help, Trixie!

(Cut to Trixie as she's relaxing by a stream when she hears and goes to Applejack. As the tiger's about to pounce on Applejack, Trixie blasts it away as it recovers and rushes off.)

Trixie: Good thing you weren't alone. Trixie would hate to think about what would happen if you were by yourself.

(Cut back to the inn.)

Applebloom: So do I, Applejack.  
Applejack: Perhaps I could use a travelin' buddy after all. And even though we aint been friends that long, Trixie, you sound like just the pony. Will ya come?  
Trixie: That's a perfect idea.  
Applejack: Great!

(Applejack and Trixie head out.)

Applebloom: Have a good trip.  
Applejack: We will.  
Trixie: And don't worry. Trixie will take good care of your sister.

(They go around the world, looking at the great sights. Eventually, they arrive at the forest and have a picnic.)

Applejack: This here has been a fantastic trip so far. What scenery.  
Trixie: What food. Trixie bets you could smell these biscuits for miles.

(Cut to a bear as it smells the food and heads off. Cut back to the camp site.)

Applejack (yawning): Oh, that lunch made me a mite sleepy. I'd take a nap, but who knows what kinda stuff lives in these woods.  
Trixie: Go ahead and rest. Trixie will keep her eyes and ears open for trouble.  
Applejack: Alright.

(Applejack goes to sleep as Trixie looks around.)

Trixie: Seems peaceful enough. (Yawning) Maybe Trixie will rest her eyes and just keep her ears open.

(She ends up going to sleep. The bear's growling is heard as Applejack wakes up with a start.)

Applejack: Ah! Trixie, wake up! You were supposed ta keep watch!

(Trixie wakes up, sees the bear, and screams as she jumps to a tree as Applejack follows, unable to follow her up.)

Applejack: Trixie, come back! You said you'd help me in a jam!  
Trixie: Well... I didn't realize the jam would be a bear.  
Applejack: But ya promised to protect me!

(The bear lumbers forward as Applejack backs into a tree.)

Applejack: Oh... I'm dead... Unless... The bear thinks I'm already dead.

(She plops to the ground and lies motionless as the bear sniffs Applejack and just walks off.)

Trixie: Thank Celestia that bear decided to leave you alone. You know, it looked like it was whispering something to you.  
Applejack: Oh yeah, and he said some very thoughtful things.  
Trixie: Really? What?  
Applejack: He said the kinda friend I really need is one who's trustworthy and won't run at the first sign of danger.

(Applejack walks off as Trixie sighs sadly. Cut back to the classroom.)

Doug: The two returned home, and they never said a word to each other again.  
Applebloom: Yeash. All that boastin', and she couldn't even keep awake after lunch.  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah, that was great, Doug.  
Doug: Thanks.  
Scootaloo: More action next time!  
Doug: Okay, okay Scootaloo. Calm down there.

(Everyone has a good chuckle.)

The End.


	4. Chris vs Rob

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 4: Chris vs. Rob

(It opens at a camping trip near the Everfree Forest as Rainbow Dash is telling the story of the Headless Horse to everypony as Chris is actually the most nervous when Rob comes behind Chris.)

Rob: Hey Chris-  
Chris: MOMMY!

(Chris kicks Rob in the eye.)

Rob: OH CELESTIA, MY EYE!  
Chris: Oh dude, I'm so sorry. I thought it was the Headless Horse!  
Rob: The Headless Horse isn't real, you idiot!  
Fluttershy: Come on, Rob. We better get you to the hospital.

(Cut to the next day at Sweet Apple Acres as Chris is applebucking with Applejack as his mind's away.)

Applejack: Come on now, Chris. I'm sure Rob knows it was an accident.  
Chris: Yeah, I just wish I could make it right... Hey, I know!

(Rob comes up with an eye-patch.)

Chris: Rob, I'm so sorry! As a condolence, I want you to kick me in the face.  
Rob: Dude, I'm not kicking you in the face.  
Chris: Come on, I feel really bad, and it's the only way to make things right.  
Rob: Chris, I-  
Chris: Please?  
Rob: Chris-  
Chris: C'mon!  
Rob: Alright, fine!

(Rob moves to kick him as Chris chickens out and ducks, making Rob kick the barn, breaking his hind legs.)

Rob: AHH!  
Chris: Holy smokes, dude! I'm so sorry!  
Rob: Why did you duck?!  
Chris: I'm sorry! It was a reflex! When a pair of legs come at you, you duck! Watch.

(Chris kicks Rob in the face again.)

Rob: AH! MY EYE! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!  
Chris: What's wrong with me?! What's wrong with you? Why didn't you duck?!  
Applejack: Uh fellas, maybe we should discuss this on the way to the hospital.  
Chris: Yeah, and maybe while we're there, they can check Rob's reflexes or something.

(Cut to later as Chris and Applejack wheel Rob back to the farm in a wheelchair as he now has another eye-patch.)

Doug: Oh geez. This hasn't been your week.  
Rob: Shut up.  
Twilight: Yeash Chris, you've totaled Rob.  
Chris: I know, it's so bad! Hey Doug, please tell me you'd duck if a guy did this.

(Chris gets ready to kick.)

Doug: Chris, no!

(Doug ducks as he accidentally hits Rob in the back of the head, knocking him out.)

Doug: ... I think you gave him a concussion.  
Chris: Oh man! Oh man!  
Applejack: Uh... Sugar Cube, how about we get back to applebuckin' while the others take him to the hospital. I don't think Rob'll be happy ta see ya when he wakes up.  
Chris: Yes dear.

(Cut to Rob in a hospital bed with his head wrapped in bandages as he's gritting his teeth.)

Fluttershy: Now dear, I know you're angry, but Chris didn't mean to hurt you.

(Pan back to reveal that he's using his Stratadon hands to choke Chris.)

Fluttershy: But you really need to stop choking Chris.

(Rob let's go.)

Chris: Um... Enjoy the gift.

(Chris rushes off as Rob feels a present on his lap.)

Fluttershy: Aw, wasn't that sweet? Why don't you open it, Rob?  
Rob: I don't wanna.  
Fluttershy: Now Rob, Chris has been bending over backwards trying to apologize.  
Rob: Fine. Fine.

(Rob opens the package, but he can't see what's inside thanks to the eye patches, but Fluttershy sees an apple tart.)

Fluttershy: Aw... Applejack and Chris made you an apple tart. Your favorite. Well how about you have some.  
Rob: No way. I'm not being fed like a baby by my wife.

(Fluttershy takes a piece of tart to Rob's mouth.)

Fluttershy: Come on, open up, Rob.  
Rob (childlike): No!  
Fluttershy: Now Rob, you're going to eat this now.  
Rob (groaning): Yes dear.

(Fluttershy feeds him like a baby as he groans at his circumstances. Twilight comes in.)

Twilight: Hey Rob, I talked to the doctor. You'll be out in a week... Or two... Or three considering your concussion.

(Rob groans.)

The End.


	5. At the Carousel

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 5: At the Carousel

(It opens at Carousel Boutique as John and Rarity wake up.)

John: Morning dear. I must say, rather nicer waking up here than when the fellows and I lived together.  
Rarity: Well of course, dear. Now, I believe you have that magic show soon.  
John: Indeed.

(They head down as Sweetie Belle's at the stove, making something.)

Rarity: Well Sweetie Belle, what would that be?  
Sweetie Belle: A breakfast for my big sister, and my new big brother.

(She brings out smiley face eggs with pancakes.)

Rarity: Oh, lovely, Sweetie Belle. I must say you're cooking's improved quite well.  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah. Hey John, are you gonna do that exploding piñata trick again?  
John: Actually, I figured on trying some escape artistry.  
Sweetie Belle: What's that?  
John: Okay, you and your sister are going to chain me up and lock me in a chest, and I'll escape.  
Sweetie Belle: Ooh... Oh, did you hear Doug's story about the bear and the travelers?  
John: Yes. You told us about it the day you came back from class.  
Sweetie Belle: Oh yeah.

(Cut to the stage as everypony is there.)

John: Mares and stallions, I, John Brown, am about to attempt to enter the world of escape artistry. In which my lovely wife and assistant, Rarity, who also made this lovely outfit, will bind me in metal chains.  
Rarity: Hello all.  
Pinkie: Hi Rarity!

(Rarity does so.)

John: Next, I shall be placed in this unprepared wooden chest, and once inside, I shall attempt to escape the chains and the chest without breaking either. Impossible, I can hear some of you say? We shall see.

(He's placed in the chest. Eventually, it opens from the inside, and he comes out with the chains in perfect condition as everypony cheers.)

John: Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you very much.

(Everyone cheers.)

The End.


	6. The Wrath of Nightmare Moon Part 1

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 6: The Wrath of Nightmare Moon Part 1

(It opens as everyone's relaxing when the power goes out again.)

Rob: Seriously?! Again?! You could set your frigging calendar with how often we have power outages in our neighborhood!  
Doug: Well, I might as well tell you about what happened to the ponies of the Starship Enterprise after V'Ger. Behold... The Wrath of-

BLACK

In the 23rd century...

(It opens on the Bridge of the Enterprise as everypony now wears the TOS movie uniforms. Twilight is at the science post, Derpy's at communications, and Fluttershy is at the helm.)

Rarity (VO): Captain's log, Stardate 8130.3... I think. Wait, is it March 3rd or March 4th? Anyway, the Starship Enterprise is on a training mission to Gamma Hydra. Section 14, coordinates 22-87-4. Approaching Neutral Zone, all systems normal and functioning.  
Applejack: Uh, beg pardon, but is a training mission really safe when we're doing it at the border we share with the Stratadons?!  
Rarity: Oh, pish-posh. Mr. Fluttershy, plot a course to avoid the Neutral Zone.  
Fluttershy: Um... Okay.  
Derpy: Hey Captain Rarity! I've got something!  
Voice (statically): This is the Kobayashi Maru! We have hit a space mine and drifted into the Neutral Zone. Life support failing! Need help!  
Rarity: How many people are on that ship?  
Derpy: Three hundred.  
Rarity: ... Mr. Fluttershy, change course into the Neutral Zone.  
Fluttershy: Um... Captain... If we do that, won't we be violating the treaty and getting the big scary Stratadons mad at us?  
Rarity: I am well aware, Fluttershy, but we can't just leave them there. That'd just be mean.

(They head into the Zone as three Klingon Battle Cruisers decloak and fire torpedoes.)

Rarity: Battle stations! Raise shields! Take evasive action!

(They're hit as it takes out Fluttershy. Applejack goes to check on her, but she's taken out as well. Eventually, the ship is fried as Rarity goes to the communicator.)

Rarity: All hands, evacuate the ship. This is not a drill.

(The lights go out as a door opens to reveal a blue light as Rainbow Dash comes out.)

Rarity: Any suggestions, Admiral?  
Rainbow Dash: Prayer Mr. Rarity. The Klingons don't take prisoners.  
Rarity: But what about that time they took you prisoner on Organia?  
Rainbow Dash: ... Shut up.

(She goes to Applejack.)

Rainbow Dash: Physician, heal thyself.  
Applejack: Is that all ya have ta say? What about my performance?  
Rainbow Dash: I'm not a drama critic.

(Twilight picks herself up.)

Twilight: Cadets, to the briefing room.

(They head out, except for Rarity.)

Rarity: Permission to speak freely, sir.  
Rainbow Dash: Permission granted.  
Rarity: I don't feel this was a fair test of my command abilities. There was no way to win.  
Rainbow Dash: A no win situation is a possibility every commander may face. Has that ever occurred to you?  
Rarity: No sir, it has not.  
Rainbow: How we deal with death is at least as important as how we deal with life, wouldn't you say?  
Rarity: Yes sir.  
Applejack: Beg pardon Admiral, but wouldn't it make more sense to just give the Enterprise a more experienced crew again?  
Rainbow Dash: Galloping around the cosmos is a game for the young, Doctor.  
Derpy: What's she mean by that?

(Cut to outside the training room to reveal that they're on Earth at Starfleet Academy as Twilight waits for Rainbow Dash as she's holding a book.)

Rainbow Dash: Twilight? Aren't you dead?

(Twilight raises an eyebrow.)

Rainbow Dash: By the way, thanks for this book. "A Tale of Two Cities".  
Twilight: It's a first addition for your antique collection as a birthday present.  
Rainbow Dash: Definitely.  
Twilight: May I also inquire as to your assessment of the trainees' handling of the Kobayashi Maru?  
Rainbow Dash: As good as can be expected.  
Twilight: Interesting, given how you took the test three times, with your third attempt being... Shall we say... Controversial.

(Cut to Rainbow Dash's apartment as she's reading, holding the book a long way off, as the doorbell rings, and Rainbow Dash answers it.)

Rainbow Dash: Hey Applejack, what brings you here?  
Applejack: A friendly tip. Beware doctors bearing gifts.

(She gives Rainbow Dash a bottle of blue liquid.)

Rainbow Dash: Romulan Cider. Why Applejack, you know this is illegal.  
Applejack: I only use it for medicinal purposes. Like after paying alimony. Also, I got ya more antiques for your collection. They're over four hundred years old.

(She hands Rainbow Dash a pair of glasses.)

Applejack: They're for your eyes. For most patients with far sightedness these days, I just prescribe Retinox Five.  
Rainbow Dash: I'm allergic to Retinox Five.  
Applejack: Exactly. Happy fiftieth, Rainbow.  
Rainbow Dash (unenthusiastically): Thanks.  
Applejack (groaning): Oh... Dang it, Rainbow. Everyone has birthdays. Why are we treating yours like a funeral?!  
Rainbow Dash: I don't want to be lectured right now, Applejack.  
Applejack: Rainbow, this aint about age. It's about piloting a desk when ya wanna pilot the Enterprise! ... Rainbow, I'm your doctor, and I'm your friend. Get back your command. Get it back before ya become like your collection. Before ya really do become old.

(Cut to a ship called the Reliant.)

Applebloom (VO): Starship log, Stardate 8130.4... I think. We really need an easier way ta do this. Log entry by First Officer Applebloom. Starship Reliant on orbital approach to Ceti Alpha VI in connection with Project Genesis. We are continuing our search for a lifeless planet that will satisfy the requirements of a test site for the Genesis experiments. This is the sixteenth planet we have visited. So far, no success.

(Cut to inside as Applebloom's captain is John.)

Applebloom: Hey Captain, this planet aint nothin' but a big ol' dust ball in space.  
John: absolutely lifeless. Sounds perfect for Project Genesis.

(A beep is heard from the computer.)

Applebloom: Uh-oh. Uh... Does it have ta be completely lifeless?  
John (groaning): Call Dr. Hagrid.

(Cut to a research area where another Pegasus version of Rob is there with an adult version of Scootaloo.)

Applebloom: Heh-heh. Hey Dr. Hagrid. Um... We're at Ceti Alpha VI, and there's this tiny little life form on it-  
Rob: Applebloom, that planet has to have no life on it at all before I'll allow Phase III to happen there!  
Applebloom: Okay, okay, calm down. We were just wonderin' if we could move it.  
Rob: Alright, that would be fine, but we're only testing Phase III on Ceti Alpha VI is that life form can be removed.  
Applebloom: Yes ma'am.

(Applebloom turns off the screen.)

Scootaloo: Every time we have dealings with Starfleet, I get nervous. We are dealing with something that...could be converted into a dreadful weapon. Remember that overgrown Girl Scout you used to hang around with? That's exactly the kind of mare...  
Rob: Listen, kiddo, Rainbow Dash was many things, but she was never a Girl Scout!  
Scootaloo: Okay, Dad. After all, after Genesis, you'll be famous! The next Albert Einstein or Thomas Edison.

(Rob smiles. Cut to Applebloom and John beaming down to the surface of the planet.)

John: Applebloom, are you sure that these are the right coordinates?  
Applebloom: I'm getting some faint readings.

(They go to two cargo canisters fused together as they enter inside. Applebloom looks around and sees a shelf full of books including King Lir, Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and the Holy Bible as she also sees a seat belt with the words Botany Bay on it.)

Applebloom: Botany Bay. Botany Bay? Oh no! We gotta get outta here!  
John: Why?  
Applebloom: There aint no time to explain, just run!

(They head out when they're met by a group of robed men. They pull the two inside as they remove their robes with their leader going last, removing her helmet to reveal Nightmare Moon.)

Applebloom: Oh no. Nightmare Moon...

(Nightmare Moon tosses her helmet to another person as she goes to John.)

Nightmare Moon: I don't know you.

(She then goes to Applebloom.)

Nightmare Moon: But you? I never forget a face. Mr... Apple. Isn't it?  
John: Applebloom, who is this person?  
Applebloom: A criminal sir! A product of late twentieth century engineering!  
John: Well whoever you are, I demand-  
Nightmare Moon: You are in a position to demand nothing. I however am in a position to grant nothing. What you see here are all that remains of the company and crew of the Botany Bay, marooned here fifteen years ago by Captain Rainbow Dash.  
John: Now hold on just a-

(He struggles but can't escape the grip of one of Nightmare Moon's aids.)

Nightmare Moon: Captain, Captain, you're wasting your strength. These ponies swore allegiance to me two hundred years before you were even born. Do you mean to tell me she never told you the tale? (To Applebloom) To amuse your captain? She never told you how the Enterprise picked up the Botany Bay, lost in space since the year 1996? Myself and the ship's company in cryogenic freeze?  
John: I've never even met Admiral Dash.  
Nightmare Moon: Admiral? ... Admiral... So she never told you how Admiral Rainbow Dash sent seventy-two of us into exile on this barren sand heap with only the contents of this cargo bay.  
Applebloom: You're lyin'! On Ceti Alpha V there was life! A fair chance-  
Nightmare Moon: THIS IS CETI ALPHA V! Ceti Alpha VI exploded six months after we were left here. The shock shifted the orbit of this planet and everything was laid waste. Admiral Dash never bothered to check on our progress. It was only the fact of my genetically engineered intellect that allowed us to survive. On Earth...two hundred years ago, I was a princess...with power over millions.  
Applebloom: Captain Dash was your host. You repaid her hospitality by trying to steal his ship and murder her!

(Nightmare Moon's eyes widen with realization.)

Nightmare Moon: You didn't expect to find me. No, you thought this was Ceti Alpha Vi. So why are you here?

(Both ponies keep their mouths shut when Nightmare Moon lifts Applebloom up and holds her upside down.)

Nightmare Moon: Why are you here?

(Applebloom keeps her mouth shut as Nightmare Moon sets her down and walks over to a canister filled halfway up with sand.)

Nightmare Moon: Allow me to introduce you to Ceti Alpha V's only remaining indigenous life. They were responsible for the deaths of twenty of my crew. Among them... My beloved husband.

(Nightmare Moon opens a canister and puts a pair of tongs down as an eel with pincers in the front grabs them as she quickly maneuvers the pincers to its back as she uses tweezers to remove to larva eels from its back and drops them into a large bowl.)

Nightmare Moon: Not all at once, and not instantly to be sure. You see, their young enter through the ear and wrap themselves around the cerebral cortex. This has the effect of rendering the victim extremely susceptible to suggestion. Later as they grow follows madness... Then death.

(She nods as her fellows force the two down.)

Applebloom: Nightmare Moon, listen ta me! Captain Dash was only doing her duty!  
Nightmare Moon: These are pets of course.

(One of her allies hands Nightmare Moon the helmets the two had used to endure the harsh environment as she drops one eel into each.)

Nightmare Moon: Not quite domesticated.

(They put the helmets on the two as the eels enter the eels as they scream before stopping.)

Nightmare Moon: That's better. Now my little ponies, why are you here, and where may I find Rainbow Dash?

(Cut to the Enterprise as Rainbow Dash prepares for an inspection.)

Rainbow Dash: Well Mr. Pie, are your engines capable of handling a minor training cruise?  
Pinkie: Give the word, Admiral!  
Rainbow Dash: The word is given.  
Chris: Yay!

(Cut to the bridge as Twilight's in the captain's chair.)

Twilight: Admiral on the bridge.  
Rainbow Dash: At ease.  
Twilight: ... Lieutenant Rarity, have you ever taken off from the conn?  
Rarity: Well no, sir.

(Twilight gets up and offers the chair to her.)

Twilight: For everything, there is a first time. Don't you agree Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: Mm.  
Applejack: Would ya like a tranquilizer?  
Fluttershy: I have a question. How can Rarity be a lieutenant and a cadet?  
Rarity: I'm a fast learner.  
Fluttershy: Oh, okay.

(The ship takes off. Cut to Regular One as an image of Applebloom appears on the screen.)

Applebloom: Ceti Alpha VI is perfect for Genesis, and we're on route to retrieve it for Phase III.  
Rob: What?! Applebloom, on whose authority are you doing this?  
Applebloom: The order comes from... Admiral Rainbow Dash.  
Scoonertuna: I knew it!

(Cut back to the Enterprise as Rarity meets with Rainbow Dash in a turbo lift.)

Rarity: Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: You're still bothered by the Kobayashi Maru, aren't you?  
Rarity: I failed to resolve the situation. May I ask how you dealt with the test?  
Rainbow Dash: You may.  
Rarity: I... I just did.

(The elevator opens as Applejack's standing there.)

Applejack: Who they hay's been holding up the dang elevator?!  
Rarity: Uh... See you on the bridge.

(Rarity goes off.)

Applejack: Yeash.  
Derpy (VO): Hey Admiral Dash! We have an urgent message coming from Dr. Rob Hagrid on Regula One!  
Applejack: Wow. Never rains, but it pours... 'Cept when it snows.  
Rainbow Dash: Well, guess I'm out.

(Rainbow Dash goes to the computer.)

Rob: Rainbow... Rainbow, why are you letting them take Genesis?!  
Rainbow Dash: Genesis? Who's taking Genesis?

(The message cuts out.)

Rainbow: Rob?! Rob! Derpy, what happened?!  
Derpy: We're being jammed.

(Cut to Regula One.)

Rob: There must be some sort of mistake.  
Scootaloo: Mistake?! We're all alone here! They waited until everyone was on leave, so that they could steal Genesis!  
Rob: Starfleet has kept the peace for over a hundred years. I cannot, and will not, subscribe to your interpretations of this event!  
Scootaloo: You never listen to what I have to say!  
Rob: Do you need a time out, young lady?!  
Scootaloo: ... No...  
Rob: Then help me move this torpedo!

(They get to work. Cut to Twilight's quarters as Rainbow Dash comes in.)

Rainbow Dash: We have a problem, Twilight. Something's happening on Regula One.  
Twilight: If memory serves, Regula One is a scientific research station.  
Rainbow Dash: It is. The Enterprise has been ordered to investigate. I told Starfleet that all we had was a bunch of children, but we're the only ship in range.  
Twilight: ... Only ship in range? You know, you'd think the Federation only has two ships out at any given time considering how often we're the only ship in range of something.  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, it's weird. Anyway Twilight, how do you think the cadets will act under pressure?  
Twilight: Like all living things, each according to their gifts. Considering regulations, I believe you should take command of this ship.  
Rainbow Dash: No, no, I learned my lesson from the V'Ger incident. Those days are over.

(Zoom into her eye as Filly Rainbow Dash in a TOS captain's uniform is jumping up and down.)

Filly Rainbow Dash: I want my ship back! I want my ship back!  
Twilight: Rainbow, you proceed from a false assumption. I am a unicorn. I have no ego to bruise... Well... Except when you beat me at chess. If I may be so bold...it was a mistake for you to accept promotion. Commanding a starship is your first, best destiny. Anything else is a waste of material. Were I to invoke logic, logic clearly dictates that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.  
Rainbow Dash: ... Or the one.  
Twilight: You are my superior officer. You are also my friend. I have been and always shall be yours.  
Rainbow Dash: ... Alright.

(They head to the bridge.)

Rainbow Dash: Mr. Fluttershy, set a course for Regula One!  
Fluttershy: Yay.  
Rainbow Dash: Derpy, open a channel to the whole ship.  
Derpy: Okay.  
Rainbow Dash: This is Admiral Dash. An emergency situation has arisen. As of now, I am assuming command of this vessel. It could be nothing. Or it could be dangerous. Starfleet fears the latter. I know none of you expected this. I'm going to have to ask you to grow up a little bit sooner than you intended. And for that, I'm sorry.

(Rainbow Dash sits on the chair as everyone cheers. Cut to the Reliant as Nightmare Moon relaxes in the captain's chair as her second in command, Doug comes up.)

Doug: Ma'am, you've already avenged yourself on Dash by escaping your prison, why bother with a trifle like her again.  
Nightmare Moon: "She tasks me. She tasks me, and I shall have her. I'll safe her 'round the moons of Napier, and 'round the Antares maelstrom, and 'round Perdition's flames before I give her up!"

(Cut back to the Enterprise as it continues its course.)

Twilight: If I may, Rainbow, I am afraid I have no idea what Genesis is beyond the Biblical reference.  
Rainbow Dash: You and Applejack come with me.

(They go to a computer.)

Rainbow Dash: Computer, request Genesis Project summary. Admiral Dash, Rainbow.  
Computer: Retinal Scan.

(It scans Rainbow Dash's eye as the project appears with Rob on the screen.)

Twilight: Dr. Hagrid.  
Rainbow Dash: Yes.  
Rob: What exactly is Genesis? To put it simply, Genesis is life from lifelessness. It is a process whereby molecular structure is reorganized at a subatomic level into life-generating matter or equal mass. Stage One of our experiment was conducted in a laboratory. Stage Two will be conducted in a lifeless underground. Stage Three will involve the process on a planetary scale. It is our intention to launch the Genesis device into a per-selected area of a lifeless space body. The device is delivered and matter is reorganized with life-generating results. Instead of a dead moon, a living, breathing planet capable of sustaining life. When we consider the cosmic problems of population and food supply, the usefulness of the project becomes clear. This concludes our presentation.  
Applejack: Yeash, what'd that thing do on a planet that already has life.  
Twilight: It would destroy such life in favor of the new matrix it would create.  
Applejack: "The new matrix it-" Are you nuts, Twilight?!  
Twilight: I was not evaluate its moral implications, Doctor. As a matter of cosmic history, it has always been easier to destroy than to create.  
Applejack (sarcastically): Not no more-now we can do both at the same time! Accordin' to myth, the Earth was created in six days. Now, watch out! Here comes Genesis! We'll do it for y'all in six minutes!  
Twilight: Really Applejack, you must learn to govern your passion. Logic-  
Applejack: Logic!? Sweet Celestia! She's goin' on about logic! We're talking about universal Armageddon! You green blooded... Unicorn!  
Rarity (VO): Bridge to Admiral Dash, we have a ship coming in fast. It's the Reliant.

(They head to the bridge.)

Rainbow Dash: Picture, Mr. Rarity.  
Rarity: Aye, sir.  
Rainbow Dash: Derpy, hail it.  
Derpy: The hails aren't going through, Admiral Dash.  
Fluttershy: Um... Admiral Dash, the Reliant is in our sector and coming closer.  
Rarity: Admiral, regulations say that when an approaching vessel is refusing hails, we should raise our shields.  
Twilight: Lieutenant, the admiral knows regulations.  
Rainbow Dash: Could their comms have failed?  
Twilight: It would explain a great many things.

(Cut to the bridge of the Reliant.)

Doug: They're requesting communications, and their shields are down.  
Nightmare Moon: Of course. We are one big happy fleet. Ah Dash, my old friend. Are you familiar with the Stratadon proverb that revenge is a dish best served cold? It is very cold... In space...

(Cut back to the bridge.)

Derpy: Still no hails from the Reliant.  
Rainbow Dash: This is darn peculiar. Yellow Alert.  
Twilight: Reliant is raising its shields.

(Cut to the Reliant Bridge.)

Nightmare Moon: Lock phasers on the engine room.

(Cut back to the Enterprise.)

Twilight: Their locking phasers.  
Rainbow Dash: Raise our shields!

(Cut to Nightmare Moon.)

Nightmare Moon: Fire!

(The engine room is hit.)

Rainbow Dash: Fluttershy, get those shields up!  
Fluttershy: I'm trying!

(An alarm is blaring.)

Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, the Warp Core alarm!  
Pinkie: She's sprung a leak! We're taking on water and- Oh wait.  
Rainbow Dash: Can you fix it.  
Pinkie: With a few more men.  
Rarity: We're down to auxiliary power.

Rainbow Dash: Return fire.  
Twilight: Not enough against their shields.  
Derpy: Admiral, the commander of the Reliant is signaling. He wishes to discuss terms of our surrender.  
Rainbow Dash: On screen.

(Nightmare Moon appears on screen.)

Rainbow Dash: Nightmare Moon...  
Nightmare Moon: You still remember me, Admiral. I cannot help but feel touched. I have deprived your ship of power and when I swing around again, I intend to deprive you of your life, but first I wanted you to know who it was who beat you.  
Rainbow Dash: If it's me you want, Nightmare Moon, I'll have myself beamed aboard. Just spare my crew.  
Nightmare Moon: I offer you a counter proposal. I will agree to your terms if... If... You also beam over all the information you have on Genesis.  
Rainbow Dash: Uh... Genesis? What's that?  
Nightmare Moon: Don't insult my intelligence, Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: Give me time to collect the data.  
Nightmare Moon: You have one minute.  
Twilight (whispering): At least we know he doesn't have Genesis.  
Rainbow Dash: Keep nodding as though I'm giving orders. Mr. Rarity, punch up the Reliant Command Codes.  
Twilight: The prefix codes?  
Rainbow Dash: It's all we've got.  
Nightmare Moon: Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: We're finding it.  
Rarity: I don't understand.  
Rainbow Dash: You've got to learn how things work. Each starship is equipped with its own prefix code to prevent enemy ships from doing what we're attempting.  
Rarity: You're using our console to order the Reliant...  
Rainbow Dash: Mr. Fluttershy. Lock phasers.  
Fluttershy: Phasers locked.  
Nightmare Moon: Time's up, Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: Stand by to receive our transmission, Nightmare Moon. Now Mr. Sparkle.  
Twilight: Sending...

(Cut to the Reliant.)

Doug: Sir, our shields are falling.  
Nightmare Moon: Well raise them!  
Doug: I can't!

(Cut to the Enterprise.)

Rainbow Dash: Fire.

(The Reliant is hit by a phaser blast.)

Rainbow Dash: Fire!

(The Reliant is hit by another blast.)

Rainbow Dash: FIRE!

(The Reliant is hit by a third blast. Cut to the Reliant.)

Nightmare Moon: Return fire!  
Doug: We can't! We must withdraw!  
Nightmare Moon: No!  
Doug: We must!  
Nightmare Moon: NO!  
Doug: The Enterprise can wait, ma'am. She's not going anywhere!

(Nightmare Moon nods as the Reliant limps off.)

Fluttershy: Yay! Sir, you did it.  
Rainbow Dash: I did NOTHING! Except get caught with my britches down. I must be getting senile! Mr. Rarity? You go right on quoting Starfleet regulations. Now let's see how badly-

(He turns to see Pinkie at the door holding Chris' body.)

Rainbow Dash: ... Pinkie, this is the Bridge.  
Pinkie: Oh...

(Twilight sighs at Chris' body. Cut to medical as they watch Chris writhe in agony.)

Pinkie: He stayed at his post... When the trainees ran...

(Chris clutches Rainbow Dash's shirt.)

Chris: Is the word given, Admiral?  
Rainbow Dash: The word is given. Warp speed.

(Chris gasps and dies as Applejack covers his head.)

Applejack: I'm sorry, Pinkie.

(Pinkie cries a little.)

To Be Continued...


	7. The Wrath of Nightmare Moon Part 2

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 7: The Wrath of Nightmare Moon Part 2

(It opens as the ship arrives at Regula One.)

Rainbow Dash: Okay Applejack, let's go down there.  
Applejack: Alright.  
Rarity: Excuse me sir, regulations state that all senior officers are to be accompanied by an armed escort.  
Rainbow Dash: There's no such regulation.

(Rarity gives a small smirk.)

Rainbow Dash: Okay, down we go.

(They beam down to the station, and look around when Rainbow Dash's tricorder picks something up.)

Rainbow Dash: This way!

(They rush forward and open a box to find Applebloom and John inside a cargo container.)

Applejack: Applebloom.  
Applebloom: Oh Sis, Admiral. It was awful. It was Nightmare Moon. She put these creepy eel things in our heads, but we fought her off and-  
Rainbow Dash: Applebloom, John, where are the scientists?  
John: Genesis wasn't here when they arrived, so Nightmare Moon killed all the scientists. She stranded my crew of Ceti Alpha V. Admiral; she blames you for the death of her husband.  
Rainbow Dash: I know what she blames me for!  
Applejack: No ya don't. This is the first time we heard about her husband bein' dead.  
Rainbow Dash: Shut up!  
Applebloom: There weren't even no data files about Genesis, 'course she didn't do a thorough search since she wanted to get ya.  
Rainbow Dash: Then maybe...

(They go to the transporter room.)

Rarity: It's been activated, but this doesn't make sense. It says they beamed into the planet. Regula One is incapable of sustaining life.  
Rainbow Dash: ... Phase II was supposed to take place underground.

(Rainbow Dash goes to her communicator.)

Rainbow Dash: Dash to Enterprise. Come in, Twilight.  
Twilight: Admiral, if we go "by the book" as Lieutenant Rarity suggests, hours would seem like days.  
Rainbow Dash: Okay. How long will it take to fix the ship?

(Cut to Nightmare Moon and Doug listening in.)

Twilight: The situation is gave, Admiral. We will not have main power for six days. Auxiliary power is out. Restoration might be possible in two days, by the book.

Rainbow Dash: Meaning you can't beam us up.  
Twilight: Not at present.

(Cut back to the Transporter Room.)

Rainbow Dash: Twilight, if you don't hear from us in one hour, head back to Earth as soon as possible. Dash out. Come on everypony. Let's go.  
Applejack: Go? Go where?  
Rainbow Dash: Where they went.  
Applejack: Suppose they went nowhere.  
Rainbow Dash: Then this'll be your big chance to get away from it all.

(The five beam down into a storage room with a large container. They open it to reveal the Genesis Torpedo when Scootaloo jumps at them, but Rainbow Dash knocks her down.)

Rainbow Dash: Where's Dr. Hagrid?  
Scootaloo: I am Dr. Hagrid!  
Rob (VO): Rainbow!

(Rainbow Dash turns as Rob comes in and he looks between the two.)

Rainbow Dash: Rob? ... Then... Is that Scootaloo?  
Rob: Yup.  
John: Now if you will, Dr. Hagrid.

(John and Applebloom turn their phasers on them.)

John (into his communicator): Ma'am, have you been listening?  
Nightmare Moon (statically): Yes. I have the coordinates.

(She beams up Genesis.)

Nightmare Moon: Now, kill Admiral Dash.  
John: Ma'am you... You have Genesis and-  
Nightmare Moon: KILL HER!

(John turns the phaser on himself and disintegrates himself.)

Applebloom: Ew... Nasty.  
Nightmare Moon: Applebloom, kill Rainbow Dash!  
Applebloom: No!

(Applebloom screams as the eel leaves her ear.)

Applejack: For Celestia's sake. What is that?

(Rainbow Dash destroys it.)

Rainbow Dash: It's deep fried is what it is.

(She then goes to the communicator.)

Rainbow Dash: Moon, you blood sucker! You're gonna have to do your own dirty work now! Do you hear me? DO YOU?!

(Cut to Nightmare Moon looking surprised.)

Nightmare Moon: Dash... Dash, you're still alive my old friend.  
Rainbow Dash: Still... "Old friend!" You've managed to kill just about everyone else, but like a poor marksmare, you keep missing the target!  
Nightmare Moon: I've done far worse than kill you. I've hurt you. And I wish to go on hurting you. I shall leave you as you left me. As you left him. Marooned for all eternity in the center of a dead planet. Buried alive. Buried alive.  
Rainbow Dash: MOOOOOONNN!

(Cut to Regula One.)

Rainbow Dash: MOOOOOONNN!

(Nightmare Moon smirks. Cut back to the others. It's been fifty-eight minutes.)

Rarity: Enterprise, this is Lieutenant Rarity. Can you read me?  
Applejack: It's no good. If they followed orders, they'd be about ready to high-tail it right now.

(Applebloom wakes up with a bandage over her ear.)

Applebloom: I don't feel too good.  
Rob: Hey Scootaloo, why don't you show them the Genesis cave?  
Scootaloo: But-  
Rob: Do it, young mare.  
Scootaloo: ... Fine...

(Scootaloo walks out with Rarity, Applejack, and Applebloom as Rob sits across from Rainbow Dash.)

Rainbow Dash: I did what you wanted. I stayed away. Why didn't you tell her?  
Rob: How can you ask me that? Were we together? Were we going to be? You had your world. I had mine, and I wanted her in mine. Not chasing through the universe with her mother.

(Rob walks around.)

Rob: Actually, she's a lot like you. In many ways.

(Rainbow Dash doesn't respond.)

Rob: Please tell me what you're feeling.  
Rainbow Dash: There's a mare out there I haven't seen in fifteen years. She's trying to kill me. You've shown me a daughter that'd be happy to help. My daughter... My life that might have been... But wasn't. What am I feeling? Old... Worn out.  
Rob: Come with me. I can show you something that can make you young.

(They go to the Genesis cave, a lush tropical paradise.)

Applejack: Rainbow, this is amazing!  
Rob: Can I cook or can I cook?  
Rainbow Dash: You can cook.

(Cut to another hour later as they're relaxing with Rainbow Dash eating an apple.)

Rarity: Sir, about the Kobayashi Maru.  
Rainbow Dash: Are you asking if we're playing out that situation now?  
Rarity: Please, sir. I'd really like to know.  
Applejack: Lieutenant, you're looking at the only cadet to ever beat the No-Win-Scenario.  
Rarity: How?  
Rainbow Dash: I reprogrammed the simulation so that it was possible to rescue the freighter.  
Scootaloo: She cheated.  
Rainbow Dash: I changed the conditions of the test. I don't like to lose. I don't believe in the no win scenario.  
Rarity: That means the opposite is true as well. You never have faced death.  
Rainbow Dash: Nope.  
Scootaloo: You're still a cheater.  
Rainbow Dash: Oh yeah? Tell me you haven't done something like that in a video game.  
Scootaloo: I didn't cheat. I just changed the conditions of the game... Oh...  
Rainbow Dash: As a matter of fact, my little alteration impressed Starfleet so much that they gave me a commendation for original thinking.

(Rainbow Dash goes to her communicator.)

Rainbow Dash: Dash to Twilight. It's been two hours.  
Twilight: Right on time. We'll beam you up.  
Rarity: How-?  
Rainbow Dash: Mr. Rarity, you of all people should know Regulation 46-A. "If transmissions are being monitored during battle..."  
Rarity: "...No uncoded messages on an open channel."  
Rainbow Dash (smirking): I don't like to lose.

(She takes a bite of the apple. Cut to the Enterprise as the crew files in.)

Twilight: Dr. Hagrid.  
Rob: Mr. Sparkle.  
Twilight: Who's that young mare next to her?  
Rainbow Dash: That young mare is my daughter.  
Twilight: Fascinating.  
Rainbow Dash: Anyway, damage report?  
Twilight: We only have auxiliary power, but there's a nearby Nebula known as the Mutara Nebula.  
Rarity: If we go in there, it will disable our shields and targeting sensors.  
Twilight: The odds will be even.

(The ship approaches the nebula as the crew gets this prepared. Cut to a repaired Reliant as Nightmare Moon spots the retreating Enterprise.)

Nightmare Moon: There she is! There she is... Not so wounded as we were led to believe. So much the better. After her!

(They begin approaching the Nebula as Doug slows down.)

Nightmare Moon: Why are we slowing?  
Doug: If we go in there, our shields would be useless.  
Nightmare Moon: Oh. Alright.

(Cut to the Enterprise.)

Rarity: The Reliant is slowing its course.  
Rainbow Dash: Put him on screen.

(Cut to Rainbow Dash appearing on the Reliant's screen.)

Rainbow Dash: We tried it once your way, Nightmare Moon. Are you game for a rematch? Moon, I'm laughing at the superior being.  
Nightmare Moon: ... Full impulse power.  
Doug: No, ma'am! You have Genesis now! You can-

(Nightmare Moon tosses Doug aside.)

Nightmare Moon: FULL POWER, DAMN YOU!  
Doug: ... Yes ma'am.

(The two ships enter the Nebula and look around as they just barely see the Reliant.)

Fluttershy: Um... Admiral Dash, I can't lock phasers.  
Rainbow Dash: Best guess, Fluttershy.  
Fluttershy: Okay.

(The blast hits the ship as Doug is tossed out of his chair as debris falls onto him.)

Nightmare Moon: Doug!

(Nightmare Moon lifts the ruble off and goes to Doug.)

Doug: Yours... Is the superior... Way...

(Doug dies.)

Nightmare Moon: I shall avenge you!

(The Enterprise and the Reliant lose each other.)

Rarity: We lost the Reliant, Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: She followed me this far. She's sure to come back, but from where?  
Twilight: She's smart but not experienced. Her pattern indicates two dimensional thinking.  
Rainbow Dash: Full stop.  
Fluttershy: Full stop, sir.  
Rainbow Dash: Z-Minus 10,000 meters. Standby photon torpedoes.

(The Enterprise drops down. Cut to the Reliant flying around as Nightmare Moon keeps an eye out for the ship. The Enterprise comes up behind the Reliant. Applebloom goes for the control.)

Applebloom: Photon torpedoes ready, Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: Look sharp.

(The Reliant appears on screen.)

Rainbow Dash: Fire!

(The torpedo is fired, frying the top portion of the Reliant.)

Rainbow Dash: Fire!

(One of the Reliant's pylons is taken out. Nightmare Moon is flung forward as she quickly turns the ship around and has the Reliant fire at the engine room before another blast knocks her back. Cut back to the Enterprise.)

Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, report!  
Pinkie: I gotta take the mains offline. The radiation is leaking, plus it smells really bad in here. Almost like...

(She passes out. Cut to the Reliant as Nightmare Moon picks herself up, looking horrible.)

Nightmare Moon: No Dash.

(She goes to Genesis and activates it.)

Nightmare Moon: To the last... I grapple with thee.

(Cut to the Enterprise.)

Twilight: Admiral, there's a huge energy spike from the Reliant.  
Scootaloo: It's the Genesis effect! It's been set to overload! That thing's gonna blow right here in four minutes!  
Rainbow Dash: We'll beam aboard and stop it!  
Scootaloo: ... You can't.  
Rainbow Dash: Don't tell me what I can't do, young lady! I've been dealing with computers since you were in diapers!  
Scootaloo: There's no way to stop it once it's been started!  
Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, I need warp speed in three minutes, or we're all dead!  
Derpy: No response, Admiral.  
Rainbow Dash: Fluttershy, get us out of here!  
Fluttershy: I'm trying, sir, but Warp is offline with the radiation leak.

(Twilight covertly walks off and arrives at engineering where Applejack's tending to Pinkie. She sees Twilight head for the radiation leak.)

Applejack: Are ya outta your unicorn mind?! No pony can tolerate the levels of radiation that's in there!  
Twilight: As you are found of observing Doctor, I am not a pony.  
Applejack: You're not goin' in there!  
Twilight: Perhaps you're right. What is Mr. Pie's condition?  
Applejack: Well I think-

(Twilight knocks Applejack out.)

Twilight: I'm sorry Doctor, but I have no time to discuss this logically.

(She puts her horn to Applejack's head.)

Twilight: Remember... Except that ten bits you owe me. Feel free to forget about that.

(Twilight goes in and opens the Warp Core containment as Pinkie gets up and goes to her.)

Pinkie: Twilight no! Whatever you're doing that only a pony who knows everything about Starships would understand is too dangerous! It'll peel the skin off your face and kill you!

(Cut to the Reliant as Nightmare Moon crawls to the viewscreen as the ship is shown.)

Nightmare Moon: No... No, you can't get away. From hell's heart, I stab at three. For hate's sake, I spit my last breath... At thee...

(Nightmare Moon dies as the Genesis device continues powering up. Cut to the Enterprise as Twilight puts the cap back onto the Warp Core after somehow fixing the leak.)

Rarity: Sir, the mains are back online!  
Rainbow Dash: Bless you, Pinkie. Go, Fluttershy!

(The ship heads out at warp as the Reliant explodes turning the Nebula into a planet as Rob comes in once they've calmed down and returned to investigate.)

Rainbow Dash: Look at it, Rob.

(Rob smiles and goes to Scootaloo as Rainbow Dash goes to the comm.)

Rainbow Dash: Engine room, well done, Pinkie.  
Applejack: Rainbow... I think ya better get down here.  
Rainbow Dash: Applejack?  
Applejack: Ya better hurry.

(Rainbow Dash sees that Twilight's chair is empty. She rushes down to engineering and goes to the warp core as Pinkie and Applejack stop her.)

Pinkie: No!  
Applejack: You'll flood the whole compartment!  
Rainbow Dash: But she'll die!  
Pinkie (struggling): Admiral, Admiral! RAINBOW DASH!

(Rainbow Dash stops struggling.)

Pinkie: She's dead already.

(Rainbow Dash goes to the glass and looks at Twilight's slumped body.)

Rainbow Dash: Twilight!

(Twilight comes up with her face looking greener than normal due to the radiation.)

Twilight: Ship... Out of danger?  
Rainbow Dash: Yes.  
Twilight: Don't grieve, Admiral. It is logical. The needs of the many... Outweigh...  
Rainbow Dash: The needs of the few.  
Twilight: Or the one. I never took the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think... Of my solution?  
Rainbow Dash: Twilight...  
Twilight: I have been... And always shall be... Your friend.

(Twilight puts her hoof to the glass as Rainbow Dash does the same.)

Twilight: Live long... And prosper...

(Twilight dies.)

Rainbow Dash: ... No...

(She turns around sadly. Cut to a funeral as a torpedo with Twilight's body is loaded into the tube as everyone looks on sadly, even Rarity.)

Rainbow Dash: We are assembled here today to pay final respects to our honored dead, and yet it should be noted that in the midst of our sorrow, this death takes place in the shadow of new life. The sunrise of a new world. A world that our beloved comrade gave her life to protect and nourish. She did not feel her sacrifice a vain or empty one, and we will not debate her profound wisdom in these proceedings. Of my friend, I can only say this. Of all the souls that I've encountered in my travels... (tearing up) Her's was the most... Equestrian.  
Fluttershy: Um... Pinkie...

(Pinkie plays Amazing Grace on ten different instruments at once as Twilight is jettisoned out of the torpedo tube and is sent into space, pulls into Genesis' gravity as the sun rises. Cut to Rainbow Dash's quarters as she notices that her glasses have cracked and plops them onto the table as she tries to finish the book Twilight gave her when Scootaloo comes in.)

Scootaloo: I didn't mean to intrude.  
Rainbow Dash: I should be on the bridge.  
Scootaloo: Can I talk to you for a minute?  
Rainbow Dash: I poured myself a drink. Would you like one?  
Scootaloo: Lieutenant Rarity was right. You never have faced death.  
Rainbow Dash: No, not like this. I've cheated death. Talked my way out of death. And patted myself on the back for my own ingenuity. I know nothing.  
Scootaloo: You knew enough to tell Rarity that how we face with death is at least as important as how we face with life.  
Rainbow Dash: Just words.  
Scootaloo: But good words. That's where ideas begin. Maybe you should listen to them... I was wrong about you, and I'm sorry.  
Rainbow Dash: Is that what you came here to say?  
Scootaloo: Mainly. And also that I'm proud... Very proud to be your daughter.

(The two hug. Cut to later as everypony examines the Genesis Planet.)

Rainbow Dash (VO): Captain's log, Stardate 8141.6... Yeah, Applebloom's right. We need an easier system. Starship Enterprise on course for Ceti Alpha V to pick up the crew of the USS Reliant. All is well. And yet I can't help wondering about the friend I leave behind. There are always... possibilities, Twilight said. And if Genesis is, indeed, life from death, I must return to this place again.  
Applejack: She's really not dead... as long as we remember her.  
Rainbow Dash: "It is a far, far better rest I go to than I have ever known."  
Rob: Are you okay, Rainbow?  
Rainbow Dash: Yeah. Just realizing something Twilight was trying to tell me.  
Applejack: How do ya feel, Rainbow?  
Rainbow Dash: Young... I feel young...

(Cut to Twilight's torpedo on Genesis as the camera zooms out to reveal...)

Twilight: Space...the final frontier. These are the continuing voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Her ongoing mission: to explore strange new worlds...to seek out new life forms, and new civilizations...to boldly go where no mare has gone...before.

(Cut to reality as everyone's smiling but misty-eyed.)

Sweetie Belle: That was amazing! Who originally wrote that story.  
Doug: A guy named Nicholas Meyer.  
Chris: Oh... That was great! Hey Rob, are you still alright?  
Rob: Yes, just stop kicking me in the face!  
Chris: Okay. Okay.

The End.


	8. Labor Day with the In-Laws

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 8: Labor Day with the In-Laws

(It opens at Sweet Apple Acres as Chris and Applejack have finished up with the chores for the day, with a good long afternoon ahead of them.)

Chris: Yay! Labor Day Afternoon!  
Applejack: Okay Sugar Cube. Calm down, there.

(Applebloom comes up.)

Applebloom: Hey Chris. Up for visiting Aunt Orange and Uncle Orange. They're comin' ta visit us!  
Chris: Huh?  
Applejack: Oh, that'd be my aunt and uncle from Manehattan. I stayed with them for a bit before I got my Cutie Mark.  
Chris: Oh.

(The Oranges arrive.)

Chris: Hi Mr. and Mrs. Orange. My name's Chris.  
Aunt Orange: Oh, so you're the one whom Applejack married.  
Chris: That's me, ma'am. Sorry we missed you at the wedding.  
Uncle Orange: Yes. We figured on visiting our nieces and nephew.  
Chris: Okay.  
Applejack: Uh... Chris?  
Chris: Oh! Right, come on in, you two. Where are my manners?

(They go in.)

Granny: Oh, hey there you two.  
Mr. Orange: Mrs. Apple. Good to see you.  
Mrs. Orange: Granny Smith. Good to see you.  
Granny: Good to see ya too.  
Chris: Hey quick question, hon. How are they related to you?  
Applejack: Oh, my mama and Aunt Orange were sisters.  
Chris: Oh.

(Chris comes up.)

Chris: Ma'am, I know it's WAY late, but I'd like to offer my condolences over your sister's death.  
Aunt Orange: That's very kind of you, dear. My, this farm is as quaint as I remember.  
Chris: Yeah, I hope you like silence. Once it's night, you won't hear a peep until the rooster crows.  
Uncle Orange: Yes, Applejack mentioned that when she was staying with us for a short time.

(Cut to dinner as everypony looks around.)

Chris: ... Hey, did you know that where me and my friends come from, there's a place where old years go to retire?  
Applebloom: Yeah and there's this one island with a knight who shouts a lot.  
Chris: Yeah, we were looking for a guy who stole a bag, and we comested now with him, and we searchethed... Whatever that means. And we looked for the bag too.  
Aunt Orange: Oh my. That's interesting.  
Applejack: Yeah, as a reward, Santa Claus, the fella whose bag got stolen, he gave Applebloom the hat she's wearin' right now and our new plow.  
Aunt Orange: Aw. That was nice of him.

(Cut to Aunt Orange looking around when she sees a wedding photo of Applejack's parents as they're looking lovingly at each other. She then sees a picture of Applejack as a baby just after they arrived from the hospital and one for Applebloom.)

Aunt Orange: That's my sister. Content with the simple things.

(Granny Smith comes in.)

Granny Smith: Ya alright?  
Aunt Orange: Oh indeed. Just thinking about my sister. You know there's a lot of her in Applejack.  
Granny: Yup. There's a lotta my boy inside her too. Mostly that stubborn determination all us apples got.  
Aunt Orange: Yes well, sometimes we all need to be a little stubborn.  
Granny: Yup.  
Chris: Ooh, hey! Applejack and I were talking. How about we show you around?  
Aunt Orange: I would love that. How about you, dear?  
Uncle Orange: Fine with me, darling.  
Chris: Yay!

(They head out.)

The End.


	9. Return of the Stratadons

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 9: Return of the Stratadons

(It opens as the gang's relaxing and talking when Spike belches out a letter.)

Rob: Uh-oh. This is never good.  
Doug: Oh, don't be so negative, Rob.

(Doug opens the note.)

Doug: "My friends, your presence is requested in Canterlot as soon as possible. Queen Amalthea."  
Twilight: Right. Let's go.

(Cut to Canterlot as they all arrive.)

Doug: Hey your highnesses. What's up?  
Amalthea: We just received word from farmers that share our border with Stratanapolis. Due to their unchanging routines, they have accidentally obliterated the majority of plant life in their land as well as the majority of their livestock. As such, I have decided to try and form an alliance with them.  
Rob: Ooh. That's gonna be tough. They're moody.  
Rainbow Dash: That's an understatement if I ever heard one.  
Celestia: That's why we're sending all of you, particularly Rob. As a Stratadon, they may take our offer more seriously from you.  
Rob: Right!

(Rob returns to his Stratadon appearance.)

Applebloom: Neat.  
Chris: Well come on gang! We've got a... We've got a... How do we get there?

(They're teleported into the country.)

Chris: Oh.

(Several Stratadons arrive.)

Fluttershy: Um... Hello there.  
Stratadon 1: What do you want?!  
Applejack: We wanna help ya out since ya've done burnt up most of your ecosystem.  
Stratadon 2: Why should we trust you?  
Rob: Um... Because of me?  
Stratadon: A runt?  
Rob: Hey!  
Rainbow Dash: Look pal, we're just here to say that Equestria would be happy to offer you assistance and the like.  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah. I even got a seed to get you started.

(Sweetie Belle plants a seed as everyone's in an uproar.)

Rarity: Excuse me. Excuse me! EXCUSE ME!

(The Stratadons stop.)

Rarity: What is your problem?  
Stratadon 3: We don't need your help. We can deal with our lack of livestock ourselves.  
John: And how, may I ask, do you intend to do that when you've only got small patches of grass here and there?  
Scootaloo: Yeah, you tell him!  
Stratadon 4: What do you want from us?  
Pinkie: We're just trying to be friendly. We are basically neighbors after all.  
Stratadon King: We do not require your help, and we do not desire your friendship, now let us alone.  
Spike: But-  
Stratadon King (roaring): LET US ALONE!

(The Stratadons roar and begin to force them away when Doug gulps and jumps forward and stands next to the just planted seed.)

Doug: _You don't know me.  
But my name's Doug.  
I'm just an ordinary guy.  
But it seems like trees might be worth a try.  
So I say... Let it grow...  
_  
(The seed pops out as a tiny sapling can be seen, and a Stratadon family looks and thinks about it as they join Doug.)

Stan: _My name is Stan.  
_Rose: _And my name's Rose.  
_Stan & Rose: _Our son, Wesley kinda glows.  
And that's not good, so we suppose,  
We should let grow!_

(Applejack and Applebloom come up and join the singing as the sapling seems to be growing from this new friendship between nations.)

Applejack: _Let it grow! Let it grow!  
Ya can't reap what you don't sow!  
_Applebloom: _Plant a seed inside the earth.  
Just one way ta know its worth.  
_Applejack & Applebloom: _Let's celebrate this land's rebirth.  
We say let it grow!  
_  
(A little Stratadon Filly comes up.)

Lucy: _My name's Lucy,  
And I am three.  
I would really like to see a tree.  
La-la-la. La-la-lee.  
I say, let it grow._

(The filly's grandmother comes up.)

Norma: _My name is Norma.  
I'm old, and I've got gray hair.  
But I remember when trees were everywhere,  
And everything seemed all the more fair.  
So I say let it grow!  
_  
(Cut to a few months later as everypony, including Amalthea, Celestia, and Luna are helping plant various trees and the like with the Stratadons.)

Everypony: _Let it grow! Let it grow!  
Like it did so long ago!  
It's just one tiny seed.  
But it's all we really need.  
It's time to change the life we lead.  
Time to let it grow!  
_  
(Eventually the place looks as grand as Canterlot as the King Stratadon walks up.)

Ok'Nare: _I'm King Ok'Nare.  
I'm one of you.  
I live in Stratanapolis too.  
The things you say just might be true.  
It may be time to start a new.  
And maybe change our points of view...  
So I say... Let it grow..._  
Applebloom: Hey guess what, Lucy! That means we can all be friends now!  
Lucy: YAY!  
Everypony: _Let it grow! Let it grow!  
Let the love inside us show!  
Plant a seed inside the earth!  
Just one way to know its worth!  
Let's celebrate this land's rebirth!  
We say let it grow!  
Let it grow. Let it grow.  
You can't reap what you don't sow.  
It's just one tiny seed.  
But it's all we really need.  
It's time to banish fear and greed.  
Imagine this land flowered and freed.  
Let this be our solemn creed...  
We say let it grow...  
We say let it grow...  
We say let it grow...  
We say let it grow . . .  
_  
(They sigh at all their hard work.)

Ok'Nare: Impressive. Most impressive. Perhaps we could discuss this new alliance... Over dinner, Princess Celestia?  
Celestia: Certainly, King Ok'Nare.  
Everypony: Ooh...

(The gang returns from a job well done.)

Twilight: What made you start singing?  
Doug: It's a song from a movie version of one of my favorite Dr. Seuss books. The Lorax.

(They nod and walk off.)

The End.


	10. Storytime XII: Superpony 5

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 10: Storytime XII: Superpony 5

(It opens as Doug comes into class again.)

Doug: Hey everypony!  
Foals: Hey Doug!  
Doug: Okay, now who here likes stories about Superpony?

(The class cheers.)

Doug: Who here likes stories about gorillas?

(The class cheers again.)

Doug: Oh, you foals are gonna love this one. Now... He's faster than a speeding Pegasus! More powerful than a locomotive! Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound! Able to soar higher than any plane! The Last Son of Krypton! The Stallion of Steel!  
Everypony: SUPERPONY!

(Cut to a circus as Shining Armor and Cadence look around it. They take a picture of a monkey, accidentally scaring him as he rushes by a picture of the gorilla, Giganto.)

Cadence: Sorry, little fellow.  
Shining Armor: A fine thing. Ace newspaper mare scares monkey.  
Cadence: Ace newspaper mare reviews circus. What an assignment.  
Shining Armor: Yeah. Too bad Cadence. Looks like a great night for a murder or a fire or-

(A fanfare is heard signaling the beginning of the show.)

Shining Armor: That's your cue, Cadence.

(Cadence walks in and observes the show. As the show starts, the monkey goes to a cart and accidentally opens it as he rushes off when he sees what's inside. Eventually, the curtain is torn open as everyone stares at Giganto, and he doesn't look happy. Giganto roars as everyone makes a run for it. The circus ponies try to restrain him, but he just knocks them all aside. Cut to the Daily Planet as Shining Armor sees the police cars rushing by.)

Shining Armor: ... This looks like a job for Superpony.

(Shining Armor changes into Superpony and flies after the cars, towards the circus. Cut to the circus as Giganto is chasing a filly that was separated from her family as Cadence goes to her and gets her out where her family is just as Giganto begins chasing her next. Meanwhile, Superpony manages to calm down the animals and heads into the big top to find Giganto cornering Cadence at the tight rope. As Superpony goes toe-to-toe with Giganto, the circus tent ends up catching fire due to a short circuit. Superpony manages to tie Giganto up in a net and take him and Cadence out of the burning circus tent, and Superpony puts the flames out by blowing at it. Cut to the Daily Planet as Cadence is finishing up the story.)

Shining Armor: Lucky Cadence. Always gets her story.  
Cadence: And luckily she gets to write it.  
Shining Armor: Thanks to Superpony.

(Cut back to reality as everypony cheers.)

Sweetie Belle: Do you have another one?  
Doug: As a matter of fact, I do. It's during a time of war where Superpony has to defend a plane from enemies threatening to sabotage it.

(Cut to a pony reading a newspaper about the world's largest bomber being completed. The pony goes to an image of the royal sisters as it turns into an image of Queen Chrysalis as the pony turns to a Changeling and bows to it. Cut to the place where the bomber was built as several planes and missiles are loaded into it as the pilots are getting ready to head out, the Changeling kills the pilot with several of its fellows and takes his place as the other changelings become the rest of the pilots. Cut to the bombers departure as Cadence and Shining Armor arrive with their press passes.)

Cadence: Cadence Lane of the Daily Planet.  
Shining Armor: Shining Armor, Planet.

(They look through the bomber as the corporal explains it.)

Corporal: In an operation, this bomber is the most intricate yet designed.  
Shining Armor: How would you like to be making a test flight in this?  
Cadence: Maybe I will.  
Shining Armor (chuckling): Good luck.  
Corporal: Everyone off, please. Everyone off.  
Shining Armor: Come on, Cadence. That's us.

(Cadence is about to leave with everyone when she sneaks into an open locker as the bomber takes off. Cut to outside.)

Shining Armor: By the way Cadence-

(He looks around to find she's gone.)

Shining Armor: Cadence?

(Up above, the bomber releases several planes. Inside, Cadence comes out of the locker and goes to the cockpit when she sees that instead of ponies, it's filled with Changelings. She then goes to a radio.)

Cadence: Help. Help. Changelings have stolen the new bomber. Hurry and-!

(The army sends out their pilots and the Wonderbolts as the Changelings watch.)

Changeling: A well placed bomb will stop the pursuit.

(The bomb is dropped as the planes and the Wonderbolts are forced to scatter. As Shining Armor watches, he goes to an elevator.)

Shining Armor: This looks like a job for Superpony.

(He goes into the elevator, and on the top floor, he's changed into Superpony and flies at the bomber. He goes in through where the planes are deployed and gets to the bombing area.)

Changeling: Stop where you are! Leave the plane immediately, or the mare will be released!

(Shining Armor looks down to see Cadence tied up and on the bomb launcher.)

Shining Armor: Okay pal. You win.

(Shining Armor flies off as the Changeling fires Cadence out any way as Shining Armor catches her and cuts through her ropes. He then takes out the other Changelings as the leader smashes the controls and parachutes out, where he's caught by the military. With the plane, Shining Armor flies out and catches it, bringing it down just before it can crash into anything. Cut to later as Shining Armor and Cadence are in a plane ride at the amusement park.)

Shining Armor: Well you're safe in this plane, Cadence.  
Cadence: I'd feel much safer if Superpony were here.

(Cut back to reality.)

Doug: The end.  
Everypony: Yay!

The End.


	11. Spies in Their Eyes

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 11: Spies in Their Eyes

(It opens outside Carousel Boutique as a wreck of a cart is outside.)

Doug: C'mon Rarity. How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?  
Rarity: For what you did, a dozen times wouldn't be enough! You gave my cart, which I trusted you, Rob, Chris, and John with, TO A COMPLETE STRANGER!

(Cut to inside as everypony is there.)

Chris: Well the stallion was dressed like a parking valet. How could we know he was a thief?  
Rarity: You should have asked for credentials.  
Rob: Credentials? Like what? A badge? The guy parks carts, Rarity.  
John: Besides dear, we got the cart back.  
Rarity: In how many pieces?  
Pinkie: Ooh! I'll check! One, two, three, four, five, six-  
Rarity: It was rhetorical, Pinkie. Face it boys, you're just too gullible. I'd never be fooled like that.

(An Earth Pony in a hat and trench coat comes up.)

Sub: Sub Terfuge is the name. Spying's my game!  
Doug: Sub... Terfuge? Is anyone else weirded out by that oddly specific name?  
Rainbow Dash: I am.  
Twilight: Me too.  
Sub: How'd you know my name! That's supposed to be hush-hush!  
Applejack: Ya told us your name, ya big yahoo!  
Rarity: You're really a spy?  
Sub: Yes, but who are you?  
Rarity: I am Rarity, the fashionista of this town, though my friends and I are known for helping ponies in distress.  
Sub: Just who I've been looking for. I need to get this box to a certain place at a certain time, or we're talking certain disaster.  
Rob: You certain?  
Sub: Certainly. It's a matter of importance, to the government!  
Rarity: The government? Ooh... How patriotic.  
Sub: Yes, but you didn't hear it from me.  
Rarity: Of course not. I'm sure we'd be glad to-

(The gang pulls her aside.)

Doug: Are you nuts?! We don't even know if he's a spy!  
Rarity: Doug! He says he is.  
Chris: Well then have him show you his credentials.  
Rarity: Credentials?! Like what, a badge?! The stallion's a secret agent! They probably wouldn't carry such things around.  
John: Oh lord.  
Rarity: Mr. Terfuge, you've got yourself some help!

(Cut to them walking in a direction Sub points them in.)

Fluttershy: Um... Mr. Terfuge, could you please tell us where we're headed, if it's not too much trouble.  
Sub: Sorry. That's on a need to know basis.  
Rob: Yeah. We need to know.  
Sub: Look, you get me in, I swap this package with another one just like it, and you get me out. Got it?  
Rainbow Dash: In where? Your directions sound pretty close to the Stratanapolis border.  
Sub: Actually, they're over the Stratanapolis border.  
Applejack: WHAT?! Are you out of your cotton-pickin' gourd?! We just became allies with the Stratadons! We can't just waltz on in with some mysterious feller who won't tell nopony his business!  
Sub: I'm not worried with Rarity here.  
Rarity: Why Mr. Terfuge, please. I'm happily married.

(They teleport into the home of King Ok'Nare as nopony's around.)

Applejack: Right. Now let's just-  
Sub: Wait, he can't see us. If he sees us switch out the packages, he may assume the worst.  
John: Well how do we know you're not the worst?  
Rarity: John, leave him alone.

(They go into Ok'Nare's chamber as they go to the packages as Sub grabs one when Chris sneezes, startling Sub, and making him drop both as he just makes a quick grab at one, and they teleport back to the area just outside the border.)

Chris: ... Sorry about that.  
Rarity: Well, I believe somepony owes me an apology.  
Applejack: An apology?! For what?!  
Rarity: Well it's obvious now that Sub really is a spy, and-  
Sub: No, no, no! Not again! Not fair! It's just not fair!  
Rarity: Sub, what's wrong?  
Sub: It's the wrong box! We have to go back again!  
John: Hold on there, Mr. Terfuge! I'm not taking one more step until I see for myself what's in here!

(John opens it.)

John: What the-? Worms?  
Rob: Mm... Oh dang, what's wrong with me?  
Rarity: What the-? Oh, please tell me they're pets or something?!  
John: No. They're very expensive fishing worms from Ponyville.  
Rarity: But why would a spy carry fishing worms?  
Sub: I'm not a spy. I'm just a mail stallion.  
Rarity: A mail stallion?!  
Doug: Ever hear of the phrase, "Told you so"?  
Rarity: You shush! And you, Sub Terfuge, if that is your real name, talk!  
Sub: My name's Jack. My boss had me mail two packages. One was to his wife; the other was to King Ok'Nare.  
Twilight: And you sent the wrong one.  
Sub: She was supposed to get a music box, and the worms were for King Ok'Nare.  
Rarity: You got me worked up over a CAN OF WORMS AND A MUSIC BOX?!  
Doug: Fine. I'll switch 'em out.

(Doug teleports in with the box of worms to King Ok'Nare.)

Doug: Hey sir, some idiot sent you a music box instead of a box full of worms.  
King Ok'Nare: Oh thank you, Douglas.  
Doug: I'll just grab the other one, and head out.  
King Ok'Nare: Yes, that sounds good.

(Doug arrives with the music box.)

Doug: Here. Now good-bye!

(Cut to the Boutique as John's reading a paper as everyone relaxes as Rarity stands there nervously.)

Rarity: See? Everything worked out fine.  
Rainbow Dash: It probably would've been just as fine if we hadn't done anything.  
Rarity: How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?  
Doug: ... A dozen sound good to everypony?

(They nod as Rarity starts.)

Rarity: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry.  
John: Oh, that is music to a husband's ear.

(The gang relaxes as Rarity finishes up.)

The End.


	12. Vulgarian Voyage Part 1

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 12: Vulgarian Voyage Part 1

(It opens in Lowell as the gang's hanging out as the girls are playing in a car.)

Scootaloo: Man, this thing is cozy!

(It honks, but only the three of them are in there, and they're all in the back seat. They look around.)

Applebloom: Applejack! Applejack!

(Applejack runs up.)

Applejack: What is it, Sugar Cube?  
Applebloom: I think this here car's magic.  
Applejack: Well I'm afraid it's a bit outta our price range.

(Pan to reveal the Mariner being taken in.)

Dealer: So that'll be a 200 dollar trade in, so just look around for something you like.

(The girls walk out sadly when the car honks again as they go to it just as a fly lands there, and Sweetie Belle thwacks it, accidentally making a decimal point.)

Doug: How about this one for 195.95?  
Dealer: Well, I guess so.  
Pinkie: That's our two hundred dollar trade in. You owe us four dollars and a nickel!

(They drive it back to the neighborhood, using an enlargement spell on the interior as the girls look around.)

Applebloom: This here car's magic. It can talk to us in honking.  
Doug: Oh yeah?

(The car honks again.)

Doug: Ah! ... Cool... Hey Twi, let's make some advancements.

(Cut to a week later on Doug and Twilight's anniversary as the car comes up honking.)

Sweetie Belle: Yay! What can he do?!  
Doug: You'll see. Now what to call you? Are you related to Herbie?

(The car honks.)

Twilight: That means yes.  
Doug: Okay... How about Lucky?

(The car honks.)

Doug: Alright Lucky. Let's get going to the beach!  
Applejack: Now how the hay are we gonna do that?!  
Doug: Inside everybody.

(They do so as Doug flips a switch as foldable airplane wings pop out.)

Rainbow Dash: Ooh.

(The car flies to the beach.)

Rarity: Oh my, what an amazing vehicle. How'd you-?  
Doug: Same magic as how we can all fit in here. Isn't that right, Lucky?  
Lucky: Honk!

(They arrive at the beech as the gang relaxes and after awhile get back to Lucky to head out.)

Applejack: Hey, is that a ship over there?

Doug: Let me see...

(Doug pulls out a pair of binoculars and looks.)

Doug: Looks like some kinda yacht with a flag. I think I've seen that before... Oh... No.  
Fluttershy: Um, what?  
Doug: I saw that flag in a movie for the European country of Vulgaria.  
Rob: Vulgaria? Seriously?  
Chris: Where is it?  
Doug: Somewhere between Germany and Sweden. I got a bad feeling about this.

(Cut to the boat as the Baron of Vulgaria looks at the car from a spyglass as he notices it shake in a way it couldn't without actual emotions.)

Baron: Aha! It's ze vehicle I've been searching for!

(They fire a canon ball over their heads.)

Doug: Good sweet merciful snot!  
Twilight: Doug, get us out of here!  
Doug: Ri- oh no.  
Rob: "Oh no"?! What "Oh no"?! There should be no "Oh no"!  
Doug: While we've been talking, the tide's come in, and we're cut off from the main land!  
Rob: Oh no.

(A raft pops out of where the wings were as Lucky honks.)

Doug: Oh thank goodness! I completely forgot about the raft we put in him.

(Doug drives off, and once they reach land, the raft recedes.)

Applebloom: It's great having a sentient car, aint it?  
Everyone: Yup.

(Cut to the ship.)

Baron: Zat car can float in ze water?! Vell zat settles it! Ve're getting zat car!  
Captain: How, your highness?  
Baron: My two spies. Zey vill go to the mainland and find where the owner of that car lives.

(Two men come out.)

Baron: Now remember, you are in America, so act like Americans.

(They nod. Cut to Michigan as they finally arrive at Kent County.)

Applejack: Well that was excitin'. Now let's head home. We gotta check on Granny.

(They head on. Cut to the two men as they arrive at the farm thanks to renting a car and asking around as they go there. The farm is basically an old house in the middle of a small forest in Settlewood redone by the apples for when they're in the human world. They go there as Granny comes out.)

Granny: Who are you young fellers?  
Spy 1: We were waiting for a Mr. Halbeisen.  
Granny: Well I aint seen him for a few days.  
Spy 2: Can you give him a message from us?  
Granny: I aint takin' no messages from fellers like you. If ya wanna see Doug just come back tomorrow!

(Granny walks off as the spies grab her as a plane the Baron owns arrives and takes them up just as the gang arrives.)

Doug: Oh you can't be serious!  
Applejack & Applebloom: GRANNY!  
Granny: Hey kids.

(The plane takes off as they follow after it, going off a cliff as the wings pop out. Cut to the plane.)

Baron: Very good mein friends. Vith a close friend of ze owners of ze car in mein custody, I vill have it, or I vill just keep her as a... A... Vhat do you do?  
Granny: I aint doin' nothin' for a hooligan like you!

(The Baron groans. Cut to the others as they follow.)

Applejack: Granny...  
Chris: Don't worry, AJ. We'll get her back! ... Hopefully.

To Be Continued...


	13. Vulgarian Voyage Part 2

**My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic**

**Season 9**

Episode 13: Vulgarian Voyage Part 2

(It opens as the Baron's ship arrives at Vulgaria, and Granny's brought out as a lovely woman, aside from a huge hook nose comes up.)

Baroness: Oh liebchen, mein dumpling.  
Baron: Oh, mein darling vife.  
Baroness: Who is the old lady?  
Baron: Ze grandmother of one of ze people who has ze car I wrote you about.  
Baroness: Oh, imagine, my little Teddy Bear, flying high in ze sky on such a device.  
Baron: Yeah... (Under his breath) I could push you off.  
Baroness: Vhat vas zat, mein dumpling?  
Baron: Nothing. Put ze old vomen in ze dungeon.

(Granny's carried off.)

Granny: Those prudes aint got no chance once my granddaughters and their friends arrive.  
Baroness: Vait... How old are her grandchildren?  
Baron: I don't know.  
Baroness: Guard, put ze Child Catcher on standby, just in case.

(Cut to the gang arriving in Vulgaria, passing the castle.)

Baron: Zere it is! Ze living car! I vant it! It can fly and float!  
Doug: There's the baron right there. I can't see Granny though.  
Twilight: She must be inside.  
Baroness: Children! Zere are children in zat car!

(They land in the town square.)

Baron: Send ze guards!  
Baroness: And ze Child Catcher!

(Guards ride off on horses as a man in black follows with a carriage. Cut to the gang as Lucky lands and all the Vulgarians stare at them.)

Doug: Um... Uh...

(He gives the Vulcan hand salute.)

Doug: Live long and prosper?

(They keep starring.)

Rarity: I say, this is peculiar. They seem to be starring at the children.  
Rob: Why? You'd think they never saw a kid before.  
John: Haven't you noticed Rob? There aren't any children.  
Chris: Oh no! It's like Chitty-Chitty Bang-Bang!

(Lucky shakes nervously. A toymaker comes out.)

Toymaker: Hey you! Get in here!

(They do so.)

Doug: Let me guess. The Baroness hates children.  
Toymaker: Yes. Our nation's so small that everyone just zought zat ze people who made zat musical made ze country up. Zey vere refuges. So who are you?  
Doug: Doug Halbeisen.  
Toymaker: Oh, your great grandfather vas Augustus, yes?  
Doug: ... Yeah... That's interesting.

(There's a ruckus outside.)

Toymaker: Downstairs, quickly!

(They rush inside.)

Pinkie: I don't get it. Who could hate children?  
Rainbow Dash: I'm guessing the baroness.  
Fluttershy: Um... Everyone, I think we need to hide.  
Doug: Right, but- Hey... They're looking for human children, right?  
Twilight: Right...

(Twilight snaps her fingers as they turn the color of their coats as their wings and horns appear. Cut to outside as the guards grab Lucky as it submits to help get Granny Smith back while the Child Catcher looks around and finds the Toy shop and goes in.)

Toymaker: Can I help you sir?  
Child Catcher: I'm looking for three American children.  
Toymaker: American children? I'm afraid you're mistaken, sir.  
Child Catcher: Oh really?

(He goes inside and looks around when he finds the lower level as he checks under everything.)

Toymaker: Sir, zis is my vorking room. I'm still vorking on ze baron's birthday tomorrow.

(The Child Catcher ignores him and goes to the gang in their pony forms and looks around them, particularly the fillies as they manage to stay stock still. He then knocks Rob over as he stops himself from groaning, and he rubs his face in frustration.)

Child Catcher: I don't trust a man who makes toys in a land where children are forbidden. I'll be watching you.

(They head off as everyone returns to normal.)

Doug: Thanks for that, sir. You're a life saver.  
Applebloom: We gotta get Granny!  
Applejack: We will. Now you three just stay right here while we look around.

(They head out. Cut to the castle as the Baron's guards bring Lucky to Baron as he arrives with Granny.)

Baron: Ah, ze car.

(The Baron gets in as he looks around it like a kid in the candy shop as the Baroness comes up.)

Baroness: Liebchen! Vait for me!  
Baron: Oh, every time I vant to have a little fun, she turns up!

(The Baroness gets in beside the Baron.)

Baroness: Um... How's it vork?  
Baron: Fly, car!

(Lucky honks twice.)

Baron: Vhat does zat mean?!  
Granny: Accordin' ta my granddaughter, it means no.  
Baron: I command you to fly!

(The Baroness looks on the dash and sees a knob.)

Baroness: Ooh... Vhat does zis do?

(The Baroness pulls the knob as the seat pops up, and she's flung out of the car and lands in the moat.)

Baron: Are you alright, mein love?  
Baroness: I'm alright, my dumping.  
Baron: ... Good try, car.  
Granny: Now little lady, you better get out of there before ya catch a cold!

(The Baroness is helped out by the Child Catcher.)

Baroness: Now, ze children?  
Child Catcher: They've alluded me for now, but I was just about to head out in camouflage.  
Baroness: See to it.

(Cut to the toymaker's basement as the three girls are bored and looking around when they hear a cart pulling up and look out of a small window to see the Child Catcher dressed as a candy man.)

Child Catcher: Children, children, come on out. I know you're here somewhere. I've got ice cream and loads of goodies for you.  
Applebloom: Hey girls, I got me an idea.  
Scootaloo: Uh-oh.  
Applebloom: If we let ourselves get caught by that guy, we'll be taken to Granny, and then we can get her and Lucky back.  
Sweetie Belle: Ooh...

(They head out.)

Applebloom: Hey! Mr. Candyman!

(The three come up as the Child Catcher turns and smiles, and the gang returns with some provisions.)

Doug: Kids, get back here!  
Sweetie Belle: Don't worry, Doug! Everything's o-

(The Child Catcher tosses the three girls into his wagon and heads off.)

Rarity: How on Earth did they fall for that?!  
Doug: Maybe they didn't. Maybe they let themselves get taken to get to Granny. We gotta get in there and get 'em back.  
Rob: How?  
Doug: ... We gotta talk to the toymaker.

(Cut to the castle as the children are brought to the Baron and Baroness in a cage.)

Applebloom: Where's my granny?!  
Child Catcher: The children who came here with the car, your highnesses.  
Sweetie Belle: The car has a name. He's Lucky.  
Baroness: Urgh. Vhat repulsive creatures. Take zem to ze tower until zey grow up!  
Sweetie Belle: You're a very mean lady!  
Scootaloo: And you're ugly too!

(The Baroness passes out as the kids are taken, and they actually do end up with Granny.)

Applebloom: Granny, you're okay!  
Granny: Yup. Those Baron fellers though aint that agreeable.  
Sweetie Belle: Yeah, we've been sentenced here until we grow up.  
Scootaloo: Don't worry. Rainbow Dash and the others will save us!  
Applebloom: Yeah! They're probably plannin' somethin' right this minute.

(Cut to the next morning, the morning of the Baron's birthday as the Baroness arrives.)

Baroness: Happy Birthday mein liebchen.  
Baron: Oh, it is vith you, my dear._  
You're my little chu-chi face.  
My coochie-coochie  
Woochie little chu-chi face.  
Every time I look at you, I sigh.  
_  
(He tries to trip her onto a bed spike but misses the oblivious Baroness by inches.)

Baroness: _And you're my little teddy bear.  
My lovey-lovey  
Dovey little teddy bear.  
You're the apple strudel of mein eye.  
_  
(He budges a suit of armor and she walks through it, causing the axe to drop, but it completely misses her.)

Baron: _Your chu-chi woochie nose.  
Your chu-chi woochie eyes.  
They set my heart a flutter.  
_Baroness: _Your oochie coochie vays  
Your oochie coochie gaze,  
Vilts me down like melting butter.  
_  
(She leans herself over a table and gets back as a blade falls right where she was as the Baron snaps his fingers.)

Baron: _You're my little chu-chi face.  
_Baroness: _And you're my teddy bear.  
_Baron & Baroness: _Together we're a chu-chi woochie  
Oochie coochie pair._

(The Baron wraps his blanket over her.)

Baron: _Vhatever you may ask  
Becomes my every task.  
I only live to serve you.  
_Baroness: _I never vill divine  
Vhat magic made you mine.  
I only know I don't deserve you...  
_  
(He pulls a tassel as she falls through a trapdoor as the Baron laughs and talks down the hole.)

Baron: _You're my little chu-chi face.  
_  
(The Baroness comes in through the door as he starts.)

Baroness: _And you're my teddy bear...  
_Baron & Baroness: _Together we're a chu-chi woochie  
Oochie coochie...  
_Baron: _Chu-chi.  
_Baroness: _Woochie.  
_Baron: _Oochie.  
_Baroness: _Coochie.  
_Baron & Baroness: _Chu-chi woochie  
Oochie coochie pair . . .!  
_Baroness: Now my dumpling, ve better dress up before ze toymaker comes vith your present.  
Baron: Oh yes! Yes, indeed. Zough I already got vhat I vanted yesterday. Zat living car. I just vish I knew how to get it to vork.  
Baroness: Oh, it'll come to you.

(Cut to the grand hall as the Baron and Baroness stand there as the Toymaker arrives with a very wide box.)

Baron: Ooh... Vhat toy did you make me now?!  
Toymaker Actually your majesty, I made ten.  
Baron: Oh?

(The toymaker opens the box to reveal the gang in their pony forms, staying stock still and looking like stuffed animals.)

Baron: I already have more zan enough stuffed animals, Toymaker! ... Most of zem, belonging to mein vife!  
Toymaker: Zese are no ordinary stuffed animals, sir. Zey're made to be as alive as your new car.  
Baron & Baroness: Ooh...

(The gang looks around and comes up.)

Baron: Vhat do you say ve split zem between us.  
Baroness: Brilliant, my dumpling!

(The Baroness goes to Fluttershy.)

Baroness: So, vhat is zis one's name?

(Fluttershy squeaks nervously.)

Baroness: I'm taking ze yellow one, ze... green one, ze blue one, ze red one, und... Ze pink one.  
Baron: Fine with me, Liebchen.  
Pinkie: Your name's Liebchen?  
Baroness: No. It is just my dumpling's nickname for me.  
Chris: ... Okay.

(Cut to the Baron and Baroness' room as they set them there and go back down stairs.)

Applejack: Is it just me, or are those two about as mature as a three-year-old?  
Doug: The second one.

(Doug goes outside.)

Doug (whispering): Lucky, we'll get ya tonight, buddy.

(The car nods.)

Twilight: Now we just need to find the girls and Granny Smith.

(Cut to the cell.)

Rainbow Dash: Hey.  
Scootaloo: Rainbow Dash! You and-  
Twilight: Sh! We're going to get you out tonight. Right now, you have to stay here for a bit longer.  
Granny: Don't worry none. Just stay safe, y'all.  
Applejack: Right, Granny.

(Cut to later as the gang meets up, with Fluttershy dressed as like a baby doll.)

Doug: Uh...  
Rob: The Baroness is basically as big a kid as the Baron.  
Doug: Oh.

(Fluttershy pulls the clothes off as they head to the cell and get the kids and Granny out.)

Doug: Okay, Lucky is down stairs. All we have to do is-

(The Baron and the Baroness are there waiting as they look up to see an alarm attached to the door.)

Baroness: I feel so used!  
Doug: Okay, let's talk about this rationally. There's no need to-  
Baron: Guards! Intruders!  
Doug: To Lucky.

(They rush off as Applebloom pulls the rug out from under the guards and the Baron and Baroness as they tumble down, and their crowns fall off and go into the moat as they get up and go to the entrance, the whole town is standing there.)

Doug: Adieu. These people would like to talk about your policies. We'll be off now.

(They head off. Cut to Lowell as they return.)

John: ... Well that was more fun than it had any right to be.

(Everyone laughs.)

The End.


End file.
